Saturday, October 8, 2011

London. The Closing chapter.

Way back in March of this year I booked a ticket to Istanbul - where I would join an organised tour of Istanbul - and then attend the ANZAC service in Gallipoli, which was one of the most special things I have ever done- and even now is rated as my highlight of the year. Whether this was just because of how special it felt to be on the land where all those booted men launched onto - or whether it was just because of how atmospheric it felt to be there on the 25th of April I am unsure, but it is definitely one of those experiences I rate above so many others in my life. From there I flew to Cairo, Egypt, which in itself was another amazing experience (perhaps never to be repeated!). Everyone knew that I was going to Turkey and Egypt - that wasn't any great secret. What people did not know, is that the day I booked my trip to Turkey and Egypt, I also booked another ticket. A one way ticket. A ticket to ride. A ticket home. I remember sitting on the couch in my flat on Lyham Road, 'Souf London' and crying with happiness and relief.

I knew that this trip to live in London was not going to be easy. Don't get me wrong. I knew that my entire life was uprooted and turned up on its head - and I knew it wasn't about to get easy just by moving countries. I thought I felt alone and sad in New Zealand, given all that my year of 2010 had panned out to be it was no surprise, really. I was almost not prepared for how alone and sad I would feel on the other side of the world. Sure, there were exciting things that I did and trips I planned to make it all a bit more enjoyable - but inside I was deeply lonely and for the most part quite miserable. I did a relatively good job at hiding that - but on leaving Townsend Primary School I was to learn that I was very difficult to get to know. And why? I realised that I didn't want to be known - as sad as that may sound. My focus was on proving to myself that I could be all alone, and proving to myself that I could 'do' it all on my own - and then flying home to NZ to 'start again' as they say.

I can remember how nobody knew of my plans to return home to NZ, except Scott, as my ticket was booked for the same flight home as his. I did it this way, so at least I knew that a) I had a return home date, and b) I had someone to fly that long distance with. I can also remember telling some of the people on my tour in Turkey/Egypt of my plans, and how elated I felt at the idea I was 'going home'. I think now about how bitter I felt towards London. And this humours me to think of now, because now that I am home - and towards the last few months of living in London - I learnt how to love it and appreciate all that it had to offer. I had also decided that I had not really given London much of a chance, attitude-wise, so I chose not to tell anyone back home of my plans, just in case I changed my mind... as not to disappoint. It then became so very easy to lie. This cracks me up to think about, as I am the most transparent liar out! I was clever though. I can remember my Nana telling me when I was quite young, perhaps about 8 years old, that liars need incredible memories... to remember all the lies and repeat the same thing when asked. So I thought I was very clever when I told my mother that I was home on the 2nd of November (my brother, Tim's birthday), I told my sister the 29th of October (you know, to surprise Mum!) which was exactly a month after the 'real date', and then when I knew I had a job at Murrays Bay Intermediate School from the start of term four - I had to ask my friend Jacinda to pick me up on the 10th of October (which is Dad's birthday). So you see - lying, evidently, is all about being smart and using the power of association! Cath knew, as I needed someone to collect me from the airport - and thought she was a great option as she also knows my mum and my sister. Win-win!

My last few weeks in London were bitter-sweet. I remember being on a crowded tube home one night, thinking to myself how in a few weeks time, never again would I be jammed onto a stinking hot train carriage with my face buried in the armpit of a stranger, or blow my nose only to wonder where all the black snot had come from. I can also remember walking around Covent Garden, feeling sad that no longer would I be able to roam the selection of eclectic and groovy shops, or be entertained for free by talented street performers. It became harder and more unreal as the days went on. I knew my time was limited - so I became picky with what I wanted to do with my time! I was incredibly grateful in those last few months in London, once I had returned from my epic tour of the UK, for those friends who were happy to help me out with a place to lay my head for a few nights. This means, that for a limited time across the 9 months I lived in London - I have 'lived' North, South, East and West. After my tour of the UK, I stayed with Kylie and Martijn in Fulham, Zoe in Shoreditch and Janet in Bow, and never once felt like I had outstayed my welcome or was a burden on them - something I was worried about and so thankful for.

It wasn't until I went to Greece with Scott that I knew this trip really was coming to an end. This was the time I had thought so much about - how excited I would be, knowing that after this trip I would be back in London for just a few sleeps, then heading home! I started to dread those days being eaten up - knowing that home was only a blink away. Something I had dreamed about for most of the year was finally here! It took some miracle of packing, but my suitcase was finally packed and ready - (and, I would like to say, only weighed in at 21.4kg!!!)

I had a wonderful evening of London friend fun at Bison and Bird in Clapham, to farewell me. I had wanted to slip out quietly, un-noticed, but this wasn't to be the case... so I called an informal farewell. It was a really fun night- there were tears and hugs and a whole lot of love. I am so blessed to have made the friendship connections that I have with such a variety of people - and ages! That is something I feel lucky about in my life - the age range of amazing friends I have. Friends who are younger whom I only met in passing, or on trips and tours - right up to friends who have had their own families and have a wealth of experienced wisdom to offer. It did make the dynamic of my leaving interesting - to look at the mix of people all jammed into the same area of a bar, but I recall looking around and smiling and feeling so lucky to have touched each of their lives in some way, and feeling content in the fact that I had made all these friends in such a short time. It was sad I missed out on seeing some friendly faces that night, but it is not goodbye anyway... because... (I know, I know) as J. M Barrie said; 'Goodbye means going away, and going away means forgetting'... and forgetting is simply NOT something I will allow to happen. Another reason Facebook is just so awesome. I can't really mention all the wonderful people I met along my way- in fear of leaving anyone out... but I am so lucky to have known them all. In some way - they all helped me on my journey this year and that in itself is unforgettable.


Scott, Janet and I at my leaving do... 
Oh yeah... you can see the red-rimmed eyes here... Fola and I :)

Our flight home on the 27th of September was painless - I didn't get a case of cabin fever like I had going over there - it was the right length of time at each stop over which was nice. Scott and I also went onto NZ time as soon as we stepped onto the plane, which really helped me with jet-lag, which I didn't really experience much of after the second day of being home. I remember looking out of the plane window as we took off and looking at London - lights aglo, twinkling up at me, and feeling sad to say goodbye... but in the same breath excited to be going home and seeing my family and friends. I also remember looking out of the plane window and catching that first glimpse of Auckland's West Coast, and feeling an overwhelming love for the place I call home. How beautiful is the country in which I live?! I am reminded of this daily when I look out of the window - or catch a glimpse of the ocean (which, lets be honest, is every day in NZ for most people!)

Homeward bound... 
Cheery bye, London town! 
Minutes from landing! 
Auckland's West Coast
Cath was there to greet me on the other side - and drove me back to 'The Baz' (as our Brian Avenue flat is affectionately known as) so that I was able to shower (a god-send if ever there was one!) and then tried to arrange meeting up with Mum. The problem was that I wanted to see both my Mum and my sister at the same time. I had emailed Cath a screen-shot picture of a Facebook conversation that Mum and my sister, Rebecca, had had in about May - which I saved on purpose! It read:


The most important thing to note here is the 'Do you like surprises' and the 'yes' and the 'me too!', as that way if they announced on my arrival that they dont like surprises- I had written proof that stated otherwise. Cath had bought some fancy European gift boxes and ribbon and printed two copies of this image and placed them inside the boxes. I had already told Mum that I was sending gifts home with Scott for she and Rebecca to open at the same time, but as Cath had arranged to drop them off at about 4pm, it would only be 4am for me and I wanted to see their reaction - so Cath had to film it. Cath dropped me at the top of Rebecca's driveway where I waited for a text saying 'go' from Cath - clutching onto a bottle of Bombay Saphire Gin and a bottle of Malibu - peace offerings for the surprise! I got the text - and began my descent down the driveway... I waited at the front door for Cath's signal, then opened the door and stared at my sister... whose jaw dropped - as she began poking mum in the shoulder (mum was still trying to read the same piece of paper...) Mum looked up at me and did a double take - hilarious! It took Ryan about 20 minutes to know who I was - he suddenly sighed and said 'Oohhhhhhh, Da-aa' (which is Sarah...). Very funny.



Hooray for twin cuddles!!!!
After all the hugs and hello's Mum drove me up to Mum and Dad's place and I waited on Dad's lazyboy chair for him to come up from mowing the lawns (gosh - some things never change?!). Mum handed him the 'lame' present I got her, and as he was busy trying to read it - looked into the lounge directly at me on his chair, but didn't react. I got the giggles. He then came in realising it was me - hehe! He had thought I was one of Cath's daughters or something. We had a feed of amazingness that Cath had arranged - and then it was back to my sisters. I tried to surprise my friend Jacinda (who lives about 2 minutes from my sister) and I had text her asking what she was doing this evening, and could we skype. It was only moments before that, that I had posted on Paul Bryce's Facebook wall, as he had just joined Facebook, and it showed my location as 'somewhere near Auckland' - DAMN you Facebook giving away my location. Surprise FAIL! Chloe (Jacinda's daughter) spotted my fail on Facebook and text me asking where I was... eeeek! So stupid! I had been so good at not posting anything on Facebook too, knowing that it does this location thing!

The following day I popped into Murrays Bay to find out about work etc, and say hello. I loved Jackie and John's reactions the best! It was really nice to see everyone - but I think I forgot how large the staff is - quite overwhelming! I am taking over one of the extension year 8 classes for Term Four, as their teacher is off to explore London (so we are kind of swapping places!) and I am quite excited about starting back at Murrays Bay and getting back into the crazy busy life of an MBI teacher. My friend Emily had popped into school for something (she has a little girl now, but used to teach with me) so Jacinda bought her down to the Principal's office where I was having a chat about 2012. She walked in the room and just stared at me for ages, finally saying 'You're not meant to be here!!'. It was quite fun to see peoples reactions! In the evening it was finally time to surprise Sarah Holden. And surprise her I did! Her boy, Tane, had asked me in about June if I would lie to Sarah about my return date so that he was able to surprise her with me... which was absolutely fine being that I was already lying about it! The plan was that I was to climb into a human sized box and jump out - but we had some communication errors (I had text asking what the plan was and he wasn't replying) so I ended up just opening up her front door (gotta love unlocked front doors - that doesn't happen in London!) and creeping up the stairs and walking into her dinner party with her parents and sister (who were in on it as Tane couldn't keep the secret any longer!!) Her face was a picture. I wish someone had a camera. She just looked at me, mouth gaping... followed by happy tears. I later saw this 'human-sized' box... a very good contortionist would have had trouble getting into that box! To prove my point I asked Tane to show me how it would have possibly worked! I couldn't get one past my Nana... I walked in holding Maya, trying to trick her into thinking I was my sister - but no! There is no getting anything past her!

Um - human sized box? I think NOT.

It all culminated in a party at Brian Avenue where I was able to surprise a few more people which was fun. I moved home to Brian Avenue after only four nights at my sisters place... I was grateful to stay with my sister and her husband, but I felt I needed to unpack properly as I feel like I have been living out of a suitcase for months. Oh wait. I have been! I do feel a little more 'normal' now I have unpacked, it has to be said... next on my list is getting some wheels! I was spoiled by such an efficient public transport system in London... come on Auckland - sort it out! I didn't realise quite how slack it was! It is so nice to be home, seeing my family and my friends and beginning to think about working again. I haven't worked since the 22nd of July! By the time I go back to work it will have been three months... definitely the longest I've not worked since 'starting' work!

Clare, Sarah and I at The Baz

I am looking forward to my new life. New challenges, new hopes and new dreams. And I'm not looking back now - I am pleased I left London whilst I still loved it, and hey... I can always go back. You just don't know what surprises life holds, as I have learnt!

And just to skite... in just 9 months I saw 21 different shows/plays. Priscilla Queen of the Desert, Phantom of the Opera, Wicked (twice), Billy Elliot (twice), Legally Blonde, Million Dollar Quartet (twice), At The End of The Rainbow, Les Miserables (twice), A Slice of Saturday Night, Jekyll and Hyde, Shrek the Musical (twice), Chicago, The 39 Steps, The Railway Children, Jersey Boys, Love Never Dies, The Lion King, War Horse, One Man, Two Guvnors, We Will Rock You and Rock of Ages. How lucky am I?? I am sure going to miss the options for quality theatre in London.

So this is it. Sherbert in London is now Sherbert in Auckland... Home. The blogs have come to a glorious end... my life is simply not interesting enough to continue blogging about! I am pleased that I have given so many people something to read with their morning coffee, be interested in, envy and smile about - thank you for giving me such a great audience. It has been my pleasure to write about my adventures... and it will be something that I will miss doing.

Oh, hai Browns Bay Beach... 



Until who knows when...

Cheery bye :)

2 comments:

  1. Is that Sarah Brook in one of your pictures? (At the baz?) I went to highschool with her!

    Courts

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  2. When I showed this to Mum - she said that she thought that she looked fat.

    We miss you!

    Seun.

    ReplyDelete