My flight from London to Washington DC was not due to leave until 16:20 on the 28th of May, so my start to the day was at a leisurely pace. I woke at about 08:30, showered and dressed, still not feeling like I was really going anywhere. I then finished off packing and did some skyping. Mum first, followed by Jacinda and Chloe and last but not least, my Piggy (sister- Rebecca).
I hung up from Rebecca and made my way to the bus stop to get a bus to Brixton station. What a great time of day- there were only about six others on the bus so maneuvering my NEW super lightweight luggage was easy. Once at Brixton station I boarded the train- again, not at all busy. I changed trains at Green Park and jumped onto the Piccadilly line which would take me all the way to Heathrow airport.
It was an easy, stress-free ride. Then I tried checking in. The automated check-in machine was trying to tell me that my final destination was Calgary, Canada. Ummm??!! I decided to go to the ticket desk and question it- but when they scanned my passport it showed up that my destination was Washington DC, as my tickets had said. Whew! I placed my suitcase on the weighing belt- 12kg. That must be some kind of record for me! I then set the security machine off - it beeped for quite some time... Then I was asked to step aside and put my arms up whilst a woman patted me down. Everywhere. And when I say everywhere.... I mean everywhere. She ran her hands all over- inner thighs included. There was a man sitting not far away staring and smiling... It all seemed a little extreme being it was only my gold jewellery that set it off!!! I finished checking in and then had some time to kill, and as I spent the morning on skype I thought I should probably eat as I had not yet had breakfast!
I went somewhere called The Tin Goose- which looked nice. I was seated... And waited 18 minutes to be served. In that 18 minutes I observed several things. A lot of uncleared tables- and staff just standing around who seemingly looked away when I glared at them. Then I observed a man come from out the back to clear tables next to mine. He tutted and carried on whilst stacking a huge pile of dirty dishes- and then- I kid you not; he yelled across a *full* dining room; "Danielle. Come and do your bloody job properly - these tables are bleedin' filthy!". A young girl came scooting over with a washcloth and started wiping the table down as the man continued to rant and rave about the state of the dining room. Pretty bad I thought.
I had now waited 18 minutes. I only know this because I looked at the time when I sat down. I leaned over and said "Excuse me- do I order from the bar?" to which he replied "Haven't you ordered?".
"No... Not yet."
"Right- I'll get someone."
He disappeared out the back and another guy came and took my order. I had already decided at this point that there was *no way* I was paying them service. I placed my order and the food came out quickly (roasted pumpkin, toasted seeds and yoghurt sandwich, if you're wondering) which was disappointing), paid my bill and left.
My gate number had not yet shown on the screen so I wandered about looking at the duty free shops (I love fine fragrances) and did a last toilet stop. Whilst I was "doing my business" (that's lady-like for having a pee) I heard my name come over the loud speaker. "Would passenger Herbert please report to the United Airlines desk immediately". I had just realised about ten minutes earlier that my Swiss army baby pocket knife was on my keyring. Had they suddenly noticed and was I going to have to surrender it? I was hoping not because it technically was a gift from Bob and Karen Stephen for my 21st! I then thought how ridiculous I was being- it couldn't be that!
I made my way, somewhat nervously, to the UA ticket desk and told them who I was. A man said "Oh good, you're here. Passport please."
There was no; "This is the situation, Madam." I was left wondering what the hang was going on as he was typing goodness knows what into the computer. After a few minutes I decided to ask. He said; "Oh, right, sorry! I didn't let you know what the problem was."
He then explained that my plane to Washington had been severely delayed, so as there were seats on the flight to Auckland, via LA on AirNZ they would put me there. It was an earlier flight. Lucky i arrived early at the airport, I suppose.
So there I was, making my way to Gate 48- AirNZ to Auckland- via LA. My heart feeling heavy because I quite liked the idea of Auckland!!! But it was not to be... I was to get off in LA and fly onwards for an hour to San Francisco.
So I reached Gate 48. Armed with a new itinerary I handed it over to the woman at the gate. She said "No- you're not on this flight. This is AirNZ not United Airlines." I was starting to wonder if I had misunderstood- but I was adamant I was right- so I explained what had happened again (potentially in my slow "do you understand now?" teacher voice) and she guided me through to another desk. Still not feeling entirely at ease I stood nervously at the desk as the man processed my passport and printed me a boarding pass- then breathed a sigh of relief when it was all fine and took a seat. For about three minutes. Business class were called, followed by Premiere Economy. I thought I should check where I was to be seated- and would you believe it? Premiere Economy!!! I couldn't believe my luck. Amazing! I am sitting next to Les Lloyd (of Lloyds TSB bank!) who is from
Helensville- hehe. He is really friendly. My seat is huge- width and length. And I have so much leg room! My seat reclines almost flat. Has a touch screen telly with more movies than you can shake a stick at, a bean bag for my feet to rest on, a DOWN pillow, a fancy goodie bag with the usual- plus some little Clarins tubes. This is the most amazing flight ever. La-di-daa!! I am *stoked*. Especially being I was supposed to be in the budgetest of the budget flight! This is the life. NZ wine on tap- they just keep filling my glass. I better stop soon.... but how I've missed NZ wine! The food is incredible, served on ceramic platters. They have also served a fancy desert, followed with a cheese selection- which I felt would be rude to have without Port. Dear lord... I'm gonna sleep well on this flight!!!
Note to self; I need to marry a rich man so that I never have to fly budget economy again.
K. Thanks. Bye.
PS) There is a man in his 50's who has only watched back-to-back Simpsons since we got on the plane. I love it. He knows where it's at!!!
PPS) Big ups to AirNZ Premium Economy- outstanding service, food, entertainment and seating!
Ooh- now onwards to San Francisco from LAX- which is a rather confusing airport! I went through the security machine, and like always do, set the alarms off. The man told me to take of my bracelets and try again. So I did. Beeeeeep. He then suggested I remove my watch. So I did. Beeeeeeeep. He then asked me to remove my rings. So I did. Beeeeeeep. He asked if I had any piercings. And so I had to remove my navel bar. Great success! No more beeping!! How insanely sensitive is that machine?!
I then had ten minutes to get from terminal 2 to terminal 7... Agh! When I asked directions a lady said "Go left, out across the street blah blah blah- but she was speaking so fast it was hard to follow! I overhead a couple of others saying they were going to San Francisco as well... So I followed them. Like a sheep. Baa baaaaaaa. I'm now seated on my flight from LA to San Fran- and this flight is PACKED! To the point there is luggage in the aisle. Is that even legal?!
Oh... apologies for leading people into thinking I was coming home. I posted that comment in a hurry before switching off my phone and didn't realise what it was inferring! I did, however, leave that plane (and my amazing comfortable seat) with a heavy heart... Auckland, NZ sounds like a wonderful destination!!!! It's nice to know people were excited at the idea I was coming home ;)
Cheery bye :)
No comments:
Post a Comment